Managing Conflict

If I Cheat, Will I Be Forgiven?

We may never know how many men or women “cheat” on their spouses, largely because on questionnaires people do not always tell the truth about such matters. Cheating was defined by McAllister and colleagues as “a general term for extradyadic romantic or sexual behavior that violates expectations in a committed romantic relationship.” The key word …

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How To Change Your Own Contempt

You may not even be aware of how you are acting or speaking out of contempt—often it can feel like you are being genuine. Dr. John Gottman realized there needs to be a path that leads to a culture of appreciation, and that is by expressing your feelings and longings.
The post How To Change Your Own Contempt appeared first on The Gottman Institute.

Exploring Defensiveness

What is Defensiveness? The third horsemen in the Four Horsemen is a common one: defensiveness, which is defined as self-protection in the form of righteous indignation or innocent victimhood in an attempt to ward off a perceived attack. It is an unconscious and automatic response to perceived danger, whether or not it makes sense to …

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Building Trust through Generosity

Love – what we can learn from science and math Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. Corinthians 9:6-8 But …

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